Do your ears hang low?
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie them in a knot?
Can you tie them in a bow?
Can you throw them o'er your shoulder
like a continental soldier?
Do your ears hang low?

Do your ears hang high?
Do they reach up to the sky?
Do they droop when they are wet?
Do they stiffen when they're dry?
Can you semaphore your neighbour
with a minimum of labour?
Do your ears hang high?

Do your ears flip-flop?
Can you use them for a mop?
Are they stringy at the bottom?
Are they curly at the top?
Can you use them for a swatter?
Can you use them for a blotter?
Do your ears flip-flop?

Do your ears hang out?
Can you waggle them about?
Can you flip them up and down
as you fly around the town?
Can you shut them up for sure
when you hear an awful bore?
Do your ears hang out?

Does your tongue hang down?
Does it flop all around?
Can you tie it in a knot?
Can you tie it in a bow?
Can you throw it o'er your shoulder
like a Continental Soldier?
Does your tongue hang down?

Does your nose hang low?
Does it wiggle to and fro?
Can you tie it in a knot?
Can you tie it in a bow?
Can you throw it o'er your
shoulder like a Continental Soldier?
Does your nose hang low?

Do your eyeballs droop
do they wobble in your soup
can you tie them in a loop
can you wind them on a hoop
do your eyeballs droop!

Do your ears stretch wide? Do they reach from side to side?
Can you use them as a parachute
or wings that let you glide?
Can you cast a cooling shadow
over most of Colorado?
Do your ears stretch wide?

Are your ears too big? Are they heavy as a pig?
Do they bruise your cerebellum
when you dance an Irish jig?
Can they function as the anchors
for a fleet of oil tankers?
Are your ears too big?

Are your ears real small? Barely visible at all?
Do they look just like two peanuts stuck onto a bowling ball?
Can you store them in a thimble when you're feeling rather nimble?
Are your ears real small?

Are your ears quite clean? Do they have a lovely sheen?
Did you harvest all the vegetables that grow down in between?
Did you wash out all the soil after all your farming toil?
Are your ears quite clean?

Are your ears so thin? Do the breezes make 'em spin?
Can you shine a light right through them like the finest onionskin?
Can you wrap up a salami? Do they fold like origami?
Are your ears so thin?

Labels: funny, music, whatever